Ode to Opossum

The (Short) Story "Plight O' Possum"

Life as a dog's toy must be really hard. I mean, it starts out well enough. You get to sit around with all your friends, looking irresistable on the PetSmart shelves. And just when you think your life is about to get even better because a really pretty blond lady bought you, you get stuffed into a box and opened by two puppies who just do not know how to play with you gently.

First they open up a terrible wound in your side. The strings - even those from the suture the other nice blond lady gave you to try to assist in keeping your insides inside - just hang limply by your side as the relentless puppies (especially that darn red-headed one) continue to rip at your fur with their razor-sharp baby teeth.

They insist upon ripping out all your stuffing (they will not stop until every little bit of it is on the carpet around you) and turning your face inside out. You feel like the phantom of the opera after that stupid Emmy Rossum rips his mask off. Oh, I'm so hideous... make it stop... is this what you wanted???

Then when the pretty blond lady finally takes pity on you and leaves your insides on the outside so the rascal puppies will just STOP strewing them all around the house, the especially rascally red-headed one decides to keep looking for more of the non-existent insides by putting his cold & slimy snout inside your belly (through the afore-mentioned wound).

Finally, once you have been completely put through the ringer, you'd think the silly puppies would leave you alone. But no, they just can't give you a moment's rest, even though they're getting plenty of shut-eye. They insist on using your stuffingless body as a pillow for their mid-afternoon siesta. Life is so hard.