Tuesday, November 07, 2006

An Evening with JM

I don't think anyone knows me quite like John Mayer knows me. Well, maybe a few people. But, John's up there. He's my secret friend. Hmm... not so secret anymore, I guess. Anyway, tonight, he & I met up in my bonus-room-turned-family-room. He came & sat with me on the couch and I joined him on Channel 101. I LOVE our secret rendezvous. (Is rendezvous plural AND singular? Or is there a better way to make rendezvous plural? Anywho...)

He led off with Belief. And why not lay it out there for something that's important to you? Why not risk it all for something you want and believe you should have? ... But how do I stop myself from being just a number? How, I ask you... when the world (and those Vultures) keeps testing me?! Then, he and I danced while the room around us burned to the ground. Slow Dancing in a Burning Room is so much fun... would only be better... well, if only the room wasn't on fire. It was definitely not a silly little moment. How dare you say it's nothing to me?! It meant everything; and, for once, I wasn't a b*tch (because I can). And once he had me all sad and missing him yet again, he reminded me that the Heart of Life truly is good... even when things don't go the way they should. (That's one of his favorites, you know. And he shared it with me. Aww... he loves me too.)

He switched albums for a couple of songs because he knows I enjoy Heavier Things. He could convince me (and not many others with him) that I really could be Bigger Than My Body gives me credit for. I will fly. I will soar. Someday, I'm telling you, I'll be so damn much more. Not only that, but, without a doubt, Good Love is on the Way. Promise.

Getting back onto the Continuum, though, he started talking about holding on to whatever I find. He really wanted me to hear this one. He says, "I Don't Trust Myself With Loving You." He begged to get into my garden, then proceeded to break out when it rained. I don't really understand... but it all sounded so sweet. And I just knew it was him, not the thought of him. Especially when I heard the piano play and I started Dreaming With a Broken Heart. I really had trouble breathing when I realized how much I love, love, love, love, love him and how much I miss, miss, miss, miss, miss him. Could you stay, my love? And bring me roses in your hand? I promise I'll never leave.

About 45 minutes in, he recalled that he had some extra Room for Squares and reminded me that he knew what state I was in. He, like me, wonders sometimes about the outcome. He, like me, asks Why, Georgia, Why? Bottom line: don't believe me when I say I've got it down.

Stay on the Continuum, sweet JM. Play me some Gravity. MAN, I love that tune. Just, whatever you do, keep me where the light is. What? There's No Such Thing? Please don't do it, John. Please don't bring up the... oh no, the flashbacks... the 10 year reunion. Well, while we're doing it, let's do it right. Let's run through the halls and scream at the top of our lungs! We can rise above, baby. All we've got to do is keep Waiting on the World to Change. And wait for everyone to be good to their Daughters. Of course, that's the key.

Finally, he noticed the shadows in my room and the hours in this midnight, not to mention the corners in my mind. I know, I've got to set my heart right. I could be wrong. Really. I could be ready. But he knows me. He knows I'm In Repair. I'm not together, but I am getting there. I am. Believe it. It's true. Of course, I need you to pull it off. So, just don't disappear. I don't want to be left alone either.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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